Saturday, October 27, 2012

Ear Worms

I think I have that Dora The Explorer theme song burned into my brain. We've only started watching it this week and it is one of those that hibernate in your ear and you start singing it in shower or middle of work. But atleast its a break from the Yo Gabba Gabba songs.

Since we've been watching so much kid programming that I have sacrificed my october of horror movies. I've watched The Walking Dead and a couple low budget movies released on Netflix Instant, like Dead House and Paranormal Activity 3.

I'm so tired. I stayed awake til what would have been "bar time" and I'm like death warmed over today. Maybe i'll get a nap and then rejoin the living later today. 

Monday, October 8, 2012

October Surprise (and Scares)

I've got a late start but this weekend I've started my October horror movie viewings. I'm mostly relying on Netflix Instant for my movie choices with a few of favorites that I own tossed in for good measure.
So far this weekend I watched:
Apartment 143: kind of a very low budget version of Paranormal Activity mixed with Poltergeist. It had the kid from Caddyshack ( who also played Jackie's baby daddy on Roseanne) as the lead investigator. Not awful, no masterpiece.

The Blair Witch Project 2 Book of Shadows: First I don't think there is ever a mention of the "Book of Shadows" if remember right. Its a bad quick cash in sequel to TBWP, though what made me rewatch it ( i saw it in theaters....*sucker* *cough*) was that I realized the guy Jeffery Donavan from Burn Notice was one of the main characters (one degree of separation from Ash himself Bruce Campbell). Again it was a quick cash in kind piss poor, not scary but I still made it through to the end.

The InnKeepers: a haunted hotel and two of its workers try to communicate with the dead woman who haunts it. Its a little slow at first but the tension ramps up and the last half hour is pretty creepy and fun. This is the third movie from director Ti West that I've seen and with each one I enjoy his films more and more, the first being House of the Devil again a slow burner but I liked it and then the second being a sequel to Eli Roth's Cabin Fever which for being a follow up not done by the writer or director of the original it was a fun horror flick.

The Mist: (black and white version) After a storm a mist comes down from the mountains and overtakes a lakeside town but there is something that dwelling in the mist. Its a small set piece where everyone who was in town for supplies gets stuck in a supermarket and as the hysteria of dealing with what is outside causes people to split into groups and turn on eachother. Frank Darabont who would go on to develop The Walking Dead for TV directed this and i've seen the color version in theaters which i liked, the black and white treatment gives an extra sense of dread.  I closed all the shutters at night while i watched it.
While watching it I realized that Dale, Andrea and Carol from The Walking Dead TV show were first all together in The Mist. Kinda cool connection to a very good show.
This has one of the most depressing endings of any horror movie I've seen in forever. Maybe bleak is the best word. If you are watching it for the first time you will be shocked by it. Highly recommend.

Slither: has been described as a Troma movie with a bigger budget and in some ways I agree but more substance to it than other Troma fare. James Gunn who wrote Tromeo and Juliet wrote and directed this and its so good on so many levels. Watch for places and people named after famous horror movie characters or actors. This movie has everything, aliens, zombies and blood, lots of blood. Nathan Fillion best known for the show Firefly is great, as is Elizabeth Banks. I really enjoyed Michael Rooker (Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer and first season of The Walking Dead) is a real treat.
WHen I first saw it in the theaters, going into it I thought it was gonna be such shit but I was working at a theater so I got to see it for free and in an empty theater and after watching I WAS CONVERTED. I will sing the genius of this movie on the top of every mountain.

Now I'm not sure what will be up for this week. I know the 3rd season of The Walking Dead starts this Sunday and I am very amped up that. Otherwise I'm going to mine Netflix Instant for some more horror gems amongst the utter shit. I'll keep you posted. If anyone has suggestions please pass them along.

Scaretober has begun....

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Far from Father of the Year

Summer went way too fast and we did too little. The excessive heat mixed with a teething toddler made for a lot of hiding out at home.

Lucia has been growing by leaps and bounds. She is pretty tall for her age and now she is starting to get her personality as well as a temper. We've had a hell of a time trying to cope with the new changes in her demeanor as it has been very trying. She has been trying her boundaries. And she has gone from sleeping through the night to waking up for periodically and either needing to be driven around to fall asleep or most recently having to sleep on my side of the bed til 4am before I can put her back into her crib. 
Since Suzy works early most days she goes to bed earlier than I do so 8 times out of 10 I'm the one who has to try and get Lucia back to sleep when she wakes up. It leaves me pretty worn out. Granted I'm usually up late-ish (if you can call 11pm late?) so I can have some time to myself to get in some video game time before having to go to bed so I can get up early to take Lucia to the babysitters and get ready for work. 
Yes, I am aware that this is what parenthood/adulthood is all about but it can get me pretty frazzled. 
As far as work, I've got a good job, maybe not pay-wise but it relaxed and I enjoy most of the people I work with. The summer has been hell though in the warehouse with the ungodly hot/humid/stale air that hung around not moving even with the help of giant fans. It got so hot I cut all my long luscious hair off in an effort to keep cool. It was minimal in its effectiveness. 
After 8 hours in the warehouse I have no energy to do anything but come home and be a lump on the couch. I wish I had the energy to go out and see concerts but it's pretty much impossible due to both me being so drained as well as not having anyone to come to our place and babysit. I'm sure I could go out and Suzy could stay home but I always feel like it's unfair even though I would do the same if she wanted to go out with friends. 
It sucks that some of my friends don't/can't understand that having any sort of nightlife is a virtual impossibility. 
I was lucky enough to get to escape up to Minneapolis for a Friday night a few weeks ago to see a NoFX and Dillinger Four with Anna but after I got up there the show got cancelled (or postponed which is the same thing for me). Anna and I bummed around hitting some of my favorite spots and dropping in a few other friend briefly. Then I got up at 7am and drove straight back home Saturday morning. 

Uggg, even as I am writing this I can hear Lucia begin to whine. I am not sure yet if it is a sleepy whine or an "I'm awake and you need to drive me around to fall back asleep" cry. 

I haven't really gotten to sit and watch whole movies. We have netflix but its main use is "Yo Gabba Gabba", "Sesame Street," "Mad Men" or "The Office". Occasionally I do put on a movie but its usually background noise until Lucia gets crabby and then its back to kids programming. For being such a movie buff I have been lacking in that department quite severely. 

I need to stop a second here and make clear that being a parent to Lucia isn't bad at all, the worst parts always come to mind first because they require the most effort and energy. 
She is starting to repeat new words and can pick up after herself if we ask her to with only tantrum now and again. She likes to rough house with me, get scared and chased around, it makes her laugh pretty hard. Watching her bop around in her car seat when I play music is very encouraging. If I ask her where "Batgirl" is she knows to go to her toy box and find the Batgirl little people character. I usually beam when she gets it right. 
She is a good eater for the most part, though she doesn't like meat which honestly is fine with me as long as she keeps up eating vegetables and fruits. 

Suzy and I have been clashing on how to handle Lucia's temper tantrums though. It's been a point of contention where when Lucia throws one with no legitimate provocation I am of the school of thought to ignore her completely until she can calm down. Calming down can take a long time and alot of high pitched wailing. Where she always goes straight to Suzy for comfort, I have been trying to get Suzy to go along with my idea of no attention until she is calmed down because the last thing I want is for her to get the impression that if she screams enough she can get attention which I'm afraid will cause us to have to suffer through tantrums with much more frequency. I don't want her to think that bad attention is as good as positive attention. 
It makes me feel awful to hear her screaming but it also makes me angry which makes me want to stick to my guns that much more. Its the stubborn part of me that rears up when I get mad. I know she is a little girl and she doesn't understand the bigger picture that I am seeing but I feel I have to wait these tantrums out (even if they make me want to scream too) because it will be better in the long run. 
Our next big project according to Suzy is to wean Lucia off her duck Nuk. She's had it pretty much all her life and its her security possession but since she has got a lot of her teeth in we are afraid that letting her keep it too long will cause her teeth to get crooked and all jacked up like mine were by the time I was 8 and needed braces. 
I don't think taking her duck away is going to be easy in the least. I have low expectations for it. She only gets it at night or long car rides and sometimes I've kept her from having it on car rides too. The night part is whats going to be awful. Suzy and I both get very very cranky when we aren't getting enough sleep so Lucia not going to bed because she doesn't have her duck is going to get old REAL FAST.  I'd love it if she just accepted it but knowing her as I do, it will be a fight. 

Last thing going on in my life is I've been going to the doctor to figure out what has been going on with my stomach/digestive issues. I've had these issues for 10+ years and the first round of tests have come back all normal. I kind of wish they would find something,not life threatening but something treatable so I can get over these problems because they cause my panic attacks and anxiety levels in general to stay quite high and the anxiety makes the problems worse. 
I've got a procedure on Oct 17th that should be the last way to find out if it is something other than just a nervous stomach which I don't believe it can be simply because the anxiety and panic attack developed a few years AFTER I'd already been dealing with the stomach/digestive issues so there has got to be something real going on. I suppose by this time next month I'll know more (or maybe still be just as clueless) 

I'm exhausted, mentally and physically. 

I've got two friends who are in town this weekend through next week. I'm hoping to catch up with them at some point. Also on Friday night there is a free The Hold Steady show on King St. and I am really hoping I can muster enough energy to avoid coming home and occupying the couch and instead go see the concert, at least for a little while. 

Done, so I'm off like a prom dress. 

p.s. I cannot wait for election season to be over with. I am fucking sick to death of these horrible attack ads. From watching them it sounds like EVERYONE is going to raise the taxes on the middle class. Good thing we are poor i suppose.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

That High and Lonesome Sound

nostalgia can be a son of a bitch.
I was driving home last night and a song off of Gaslight Anthem's "The 59 Sound" and then it went right into a song off of Against Me!'s "Reinventing Axl Rose" and the next thing I know I'm flooded with all these memories about life in Minneapolis about how much I miss the city.
I say this alot... ALOT but its things like this that causes me to think that way. I get down that thinking about it.
I miss my crew of friends and being able to walk down to the CC Club and have no responsibilty further than making sure I get home and rent is paid.
I miss nights shambling around town with the Crew
I miss Anna.
I miss Emily.
I miss Matte.
I miss Holly.
I miss Boston and doing wacky shit like crashing upscale house parties and drink all their booze.
I miss Apartment 310 to Yuma
I miss the ability to catch shows at the Triple Rock any night of the week.
Bowling at Memory Lanes, biking to Dinkytown to relax at the Kitty Kat Club.
Longboarding downtown to work at the movie theater.
I wish I could still do it all.
But nostalgia is a double edged sword. You forget all about the shitty times, such as when I was first living alone in a crappy studio, when my car got broken into TWICE in Steven's Square. Seeing an ex-girlfriend with a new boyfriend while I was at work and no way to avoid them.
The two weeks when I couldn't leave my apartment because I had anxiety attacks so bad. There are many many more that I don't want to remember, even now. Back then all I thought about was how I wanted was to find a nice girl to settle down with and have a kid.
Fast forward, here I sit with exactly that, wish fulfilled.
And as happy as my family makes me I still suffer from "the grass is always greener" syndrome. The thing of it is, I don't really even know if i'd want to hang out with my friends back in the cities now, I want to hang out with them as they were back then.
I'm sure they have all changed, matured, moved on from the crazy shit we use to do. Thats just what happens.
I have too, I'm a home body these days, granted it may be because I'm stuck in the middle of "the dead lands" aka Wisconsin. I don't have the energy to bike all the way into madison to go drink if I have the free time and I definately do not want to drive. I've got tons more responsibility, can't be anywhere close to as free-wheeling with my money as I was back then. But each day always brings something new and is usually entertaining in one way or another.

Longing for the past is something I kind of hate as it puts me feeling shitty.
I enjoy life as it happens but I always count past memories as "better" even when they may not have actually been. I've done this as long as I can remember. I'm one of those people who want whatever they can't have and as soon as they get it, they're onto thinking about the next thing. It's a curse. A bloody awful curse.
Another thing about nostalgia is taking about it somehow implicitly seems to talk down about how your life is currently. This isn't the case. More-so it's that if anything I wish I could combine the best of both worlds. All the things that make life great now plus having all my favorite people from MPLS being around too. Whenever I think of how it use to be, this is always my wish and it makes me sad that it can't happen.

I do very much enjoy where I'm at now and I feel like an asshole expounding on the past as it seems to make seem as though I'm dogging what I've got now. Far from it, just when those songs come on i can't help but drift away to a time when life was simple and I could be selfish.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

WIsco State Fair Fiasco( why I hate Milwaukee)

I never have a reason to ever go back to the Wisconsin State Fair.
It also cemented just how much I despise Milwaukee itself as well.
It took an hour to get drive to Milwaukee and it took us an hour and a half to get from the off ramp to find a place to park.
That should have been the first tip off it was a bad idea to make the trip down.

Firstly,Lucia has been teething with four teeth coming down for the past few days so we weren't even sure if we were going to go to the fair but she was in a semi-decent mood. She held off her nap until we left around 11 am and she slept the majority of the way to Milwaukee, but then we hit THE BACKUP.
It was awful.
Assholes would fly past everyone in the lane next to us then at the last second try to force their way in pushing everyone back. 40 minutes into creeping along at 4 miles an hour some fuckface decided to try to squeeze in between my brother-in-law's car and mine but I wasn't gonna reward this bastard by letting him in while he make everyone else wait even longer. This jerk felt entitled to being let in and when we wouldn't let him in he was screaming at us even as we wouldn't give him a second glance he started yelling at the driver behind me who felt much the same as me.
So finally after dealing with that bullshit we crept along even a while longer while the line of cars waiting to get the fair parking lot had to endure what I can only imagine is THE shortest green light that there could possibly be. We were in traffic so long I had to use a "trucker's urinal", an empty vitamin water bottle to piss in. (A skill I perfected on long trips driving from Minneapolis to visit my mom in Lodi.)
We did catch a break when on the side of the road leading to the parking lot we found an open parking spot for FREE. It couldn't have come any sooner as Lucia was in meltdown mode where anything we tried to give her to soothe her mood only exacerbated the tantrum. I lost my temper from the anxiety of being stuck in traffic for so long coupled with the high pitched siren sitting behind the passenger seat. Two things that caused a perfect storm to make me yell. I felt bad about it but I just couldn't help it.
Anyways, we finally got out of the car and set up the stroller, began walking down the way to the fair grounds. We paid for tickets then it was past Lucia's lunch time so Suzy got stood in line to get an overpriced piece of cold cheese pizza while I found a shady spot to park Lucia so she could eat without being overheated, though with the cold pizza that might have helped.
Since we got separated from Robin and D.J. when we got lucked with that prime parking spot, we tried to hunt them down. We sent texts back and forth as Suzy, Lucia and I began our search for our family. We received voicemails that were so muffled  either of us could make out much of anything was said. It was phone tag at it's most frustrating. Lucia was screaming from either, the booming music, the exploding balloons from some of the midway games, being stuck in the stroller when she really wanted to run around or a combination of all three.
We kept getting stuck between obese families waddling around stopping dead in front of us to wheeze and regain their breathe or eat their 7th cream puff. Then their were the people who would walk against the flow of people and play a game of chicken to see who would move out of who's way. I tended to lose those as I have been brought up with enough manners as to get not be an intrusion when possible. There were the haphazard lines of people waiting to get tickets for rides which were far longer than the lines for the rides themselves which sounds a bit counterintuitive to me. Intermittently we would get a text from Robin explaining where they were though we couldn't find this area they were at for the life of us. Both Suzy and I were drenched in sweat from carrying Lucia or pushing the stroller while dodging rude assholes.
Our last pass through we found the animal barn where we thought Lucia would get a kick out of seeing the farm animals, but much to our chagrin it was packed to the rafters with fuckwads who would stop at the animal cages, stopping the flow of traffic, to taunt the chickens and other caged animals. That was the last straw for the three of us. Little did we know how close we were to finding my in-laws but we didn't find that out until the voice messages came pouring in once we were a few miles up the interstate north of Milwaukee.
Too little too late I guess. Lucia hit her breaking point just as we left the grounds so it wouldn't have mattered if we did end up catching up with the rest of our party, she was just done. Once we got into the car she was passed out cold. Depeche Mode put it best when they said "enjoy the silence".
Lesson learned, don't take a one and 1/2 year old to Milwaukee and you'll have a worse time than usual in the 'beer city"

This fiasco is symptomatic of many of my experiences in Milwaukee. I've been to Summerfest there every couple of years and it never is great when that many people are gathered in one spot, throw in beer gardens and generally bad bands so you get stupidity en mass.
I've gone to Warped Tour many, many years in Milwaukee and it's had its' high moments but more often crappy times.
Roaming around downtown Milwaukee or in the area of The Rave, I've found it ugly and depressing and generally rank.
The only genuinely positive memory of being in Milwaukee is when we camped out in two VW Microbuses on the lakeshore after seeing the Violent Femmes but that was more to do with the people I was with than what the city itself had to offer.

I know I harp on it on a constant basis but Minneapolis has provided me with everything a city like Milwaukee has failed to do on quite possibly every level.
I've never once understood why anyone would choose to call the cesspool of Wisconsin home. I'd hate to be stuck there. Maybe I'm hard on "beer city" but i've found it nothing but a shit-pit. The only thing that Milwaukee has successfully done has reminded me just home much love I have for Minneapolis, even though North Minneapolis slightly reminds me of Milwaukee, that fact can be overlooked since the rest of the city is so damn radsauce.
MKE might be closer but MPLS is much more worth the drive. 

Saturday, June 23, 2012

My life with Netflix...

Damn Netflix! They got my hopes up with a high definition, blu ray quality version of Battle Royale but they didn't add the english subtitles. Usually they are good about that for foreign films.
I own the special edition of BR with subtitles but its standard def and the subtitles are really hard to read. Looks like I may have to splurge and get the blu ray version. It's such a great film with the premise of Japanese school kids are getting to out of control so they have a lottery as to which class is taken to a remote island with collars that can explode. They are given a bag that contains a weapon or something pretty useless as a pot lid. Last one alive wins. Yeah the general idea was ripped off to make an Americanized knock-off. But this one is so much more interesting. Some quite great acting, some cheesy but I love this movie.

 I'm watching it while Lucia and Suzy are napping. The few times I get absolute reign over the television besides when they both have turned in for the night. But my nighttime respites are most effectively used to play video games most often a wrestling game that i buy the new version of each fall. I should be tired of it but it keeps me relatively entertained.

This is my pretty tame life now. Work, couch, tv time, bed, repeat.
Except for weekend where I watch Lucia all day so she is up for a few hours then napping for two then again until bedtime for the night. Of course with a few feedings and a fair amount of diaper changes.
On weekends I spend the TV plays  either "Sesame Street" or more likely "Yo Gabba Gabba" through Netflix streaming but it's only the first two seasons and we've watched them so much that the songs are like ear worms that have burrowed into the deepest recesses of my brain and made a nice home in there.

No matter how many times we clean later that day it is torn apart with wooden letters, blocks, stuffed animals and cheerios. Its very defeating to spend the energy cleaning just to see it all shitty a little while later.

I see my bike sitting in the garage every now and then and I get the urge to ride but there isn't really anywhere to ride to. I mean I could just ride around town but not much to see in Sun Prairie. I remember when I wouldn't drive, i would walk around MPLS or ride everywhere. Felt more in shape back then. Even though I probably walk 4 or 5 miles a day around the warehouse, just isn't the same.
Eventually I will go riding again but not in the immediate future. Work wears me out so by the time I get off work I can only sprawl out on the couch and flip through Netflix Instant because I'm just that lazy. Hahaha

Life as a father and husband isn't terribly glamours but it has it's moments of greatness here and there that make it worth the effort. Like when Lucia laughs for no reason or when she starts wiggling to song whether it be the familiar songs on "Yo Gabba Gabba" or "The Office" theme song to kicking and rocking in rhythm to 7 Angels 7 Plagues( the latter made me very proud Papa). Her temper tantrums are slightly more tolerable when in the middle she babbles non-sense, which I find pretty damn hilarious.

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Day 3 being socially inept

3 days.
3 days into this social... or i guess better put anti-social experiment and I cannot believe how difficult going cold turkey without Facebook actually is. I thought it wouldn't be that different but somehow it is.
Every time i open my computer up the first thing I do is look for the now erased bookmark for the site. Then I remember it isn't there anymore and set my focus to other websites of interest. Filling every spare minute with facebooking for years on end has taken a toll on how I view the internet.
I've noticed I've been a bit edgy, cranky even. I kind of blame that on lack of interaction with friends, because well, that was all the interaction with friends I got. Most of my friends are hundreds of miles away or have completely opposite schedules as me, or don't have the parental responsibilities so we never get to see each other. Shunning Facebook has really left me feeling like I'm stranded on an island. I feel like I don't know what to do with myself. I don't know what other activities to fill my time with. Video games have gotten tiresome, but I still play them more out of compulsion rather than enjoyment. TV shows feel like a worthless endeavor. I like watching movies, but watching them alone especially ones I have seen before takes the fun out of the movie going experience. Getting to enjoy the quirky, off-beat cinema that I love so much really only works when there is someone else around to talk/ make fun of said films.
I can ramble all day to myself about these movies but I'm not really one who talks simply for the enjoyment of hearing his own voice(contrary to how my blogging must make it seem).

I know I can get out of the house to do so activites but in complete honesty, I have no desire to do anything in the Madison area. The few things I would like to do would be showing them to my daughter alas she is too young for her to get excited about. It would be just another place and she wouldn't have any idea of its possible significance. I have still a few years of waiting til I can share my favorite places with her.
There are only so many times you can walk up and down State Street and I've walked a mudhole in that path. For most of Wisconsin, Madison is a pretty big town but I feel like I've done just about anything worth doing around here atleast twice.

As of right now we are pretty broke so any fancy road trips are out of the question. I know fun is what you make it and I've got to accept what I have and what my limitations are and find joy in the small corners of life here in Madison but it's tough for a cynical prick like me.

Can a damn website really cause this much malaise? In our age of non personal or face to face interactions truly it does. If you are so use to an activity such as this being so woven into the fabric of your everyday life and you cut that part out, it leaves a gapping abyss in how you relate to friends and family. Not that I am going to go crawling back to using said website atleast for the time being.
I feel that this is a transition period and I am going to figure out how to reroute those passages of keeping up with those I care about, it shall just take some time and patience to find those alternative means of staying connected.

As of now I am trying to keep from giving in to my most cynical, misanthropic urges and outlooks. I know I've got to stay on the positive side of things and I also do know that I am making a positive change in my life and accept that this will be a rocky transition.
Just so long as I don't drive those closest to me insane while I get readjusted to like sans Facebook.
I think I've always been a technophile so I feel like I'm going back to the stone age by chopping off the roots of my online social life and that can make me very antsy.

Self-intropection aside for a moment, today I did take in a noon showing of Prometheus and I really enjoyed it. I'd heard mixed reviews, some because they were expecting much more of a direct correlation to the Alien franchise and some because they thought there should be less. Without exposing myself to spoilers ahead of time I went in knowing a basic premise and little else and I got my moneys worth. This film does live in the Alien universe but doesn't allow itself to have that same cramped claustrophobic aesthetic of Ridley Scott's earlier work.
It hit at some really good points about who are we as a species and what got us to where we are. Prometheus did have its scares and special effects so it wasn't all esoteric ideas on human life. It brought up interesting questions that are left wide open so I'd assume to pick up the story again. It wasn't without some of those "why are you doing that" moments those were minimal. I will also say that some of the themes were a bit played up slightly too obvious and others more shrouded in mystery than was needed.
This film was very beautiful as far as cinematography goes. Really a beauty to take in. There is a scene though at the very end I felt was a bit tacked on to wrap itself further into the Alien mythos than was needed in this film, a sequel that will no doubt happen could have been used to do that with greater affect.
All in all I really did like Prometheus and I'd recommend it even if it was a bit uneven from the first two-thirds and the last act but I'm already looking forward to if/when the story continues.

I was very happy to get out of the house on my own with a purpose, helped to plug up the holes of boredom which is always  welcomed.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

So long Facebook and thanks for all the fish...

 So this morning I pulled the plug on a nearly 9 year addiction named Facebook. I've been using it so often every day that I'm not sure how to use the internet without it.

Why did I shutdown my page? Honestly it's in the above opening statement. I used it EVERYDAY sometimes for hours other just in short spurts throughout the day. I felt it was monopolizing my time especially at home that I have been neglecting conversations with my wife and occasionally interactions with my daughter. And when anything gets to that level it's time to move on. It's nice to know that if I were to reopen my page it would be like I never left, kinda comforting, but I need to be steadfast in my resolution.
My Facebook page has had plenty of use in my life, to complain, to pontificate on various things in pop culture i found interesting as well as personal milestones. Not to mention an assload of photographic shenanigans. But I've gotten to where I didn't care about what people posted about, never looked at their links or things added to my site. Then the other day I was "de-friending" a bunch of people that I never talk to and have no interaction with in my daily life and it got me thinking that why do I even need the damn thing in the first place.

This got me reminiscing on all those milestones in so far as the very low dark spots and the extremely high, proud moments I spilled onto the interwebs over my tenure:

- using Facebook as an alternative to myspace(which i jettisoned years back)
- new love
-road trips
-getting my puppy Emmy Lou
- various movie theater related news( goofing around at the Desert Star and St Anthony Main etc.)
- leaving everyone to move up to Minneapolis
- being irreparably heartbroken (at the time I thought)-
- bellyaching about being alone and  in an unfamiliar city no less
- slowly finding my way around MPLS, meeting friends, favorite hangouts and such
- falling in love for a one hot minute on multiple occasions / whiskey fueled mistakes
- living on my own and finding ways to combat boredom and loneliness ( which consisted of...)
- crawling into a whiskey bottle for the better part of three years
- eventually meeting some amazing people through kickball, concerts, triple double tuesdays, bike riding, hidden beach adventures
- movie mondays that brought together quite a few of my friends for our drunken versions of Mystery Science Theater 3000
- taking up residency at the C.C. Club including celebrating two birthdays with my favorites people
- Many, many drunken status updates that we so embarrassing that I would have to delete them first thing I woke up nursing massive hangovers.
- The December I can't Remember with Anna during the Triple Rock's week long 10th anniversary celebration
- Club Club Crew
- getting to sing doublewhiskeycokenoice on stage in a heap of inebriated humanity
-  showing off pictures of various tattoos, halloween, glam parties, zombie pub crawls
-  making Minneapolis my home
- binges of Johnny Jump-ups
- being fired on the same day as my roommate the first week we were living together
- blackout drunk Rock Band jam sessions hours past bartime
- anxiety/ panic attacks
*(forgot this one first time) -World travels to Australia where I got to among other things hang out with real live koalas and wallabys.
- cyberstalking friends and enemies
- meeting my future wife through a friends facebook page
- documenting the burgeoning relationship with my wife.
- falling in love
-engagement announcements
- baby announcement
- baby arrival
- seeking baby advice
- sharing photos and status update of my daughter
- finally deciding to shit can my page.

I'm very certain there are many other milestones that I have forgotten for any number of reasons but the point I'm driving at is that Facebook actually helped me remember a great big chunk of those moments and helped me share them with my friends but I also believe that many it's oversharing and I need to live life with minimal use of the internet. Be more present with my family and let them be the reason I remember the good and bad things about life. 

Monday, April 9, 2012

You Damn Kids, Get Off My Lawn

I was talking with a co-worker last Friday and we were just discussing all the things we hate and I came to realize just how misanthropic I actually am.
So many things and ideals seem so stupid to me. I hate most traditions.
Most people bug the living shit outta me, I find so many people moronic, not that I'm all that great either.
I just don't buy into the petrified stupidity of popular culture and belief systems.  Sure I try to smile and shine it on mostly as to not get into confrontations which complaining and trashing others way of thought would surely bring.
Not worth it.
People will think dumb things whether I point out or not. All it does is save me the headache of injecting logic or reality to people who don't wanna accept it. Its like making someone breathe in a fart in a bag. Not pleasant much like having to deal with these mongoloids.

What brought on this rant? It started with talking about how much I hate "dubstep" which is some terrible new-ish trend creeping into the fringes of popular music.
I don't "get" it, I feel very old bitching about this new fangled genre of music but I think it's fucking retarded. Then I got on a tangent about how I don't understand techno, house, drum and bass etc... played anywhere outside of a club where you are drunk and the music is background as you try to get laid. Beyond that it's absolutely asinine.
I have begun to branch out in the pop music scene a bit and listen to Katy Perry for instance but it's much less about actually liking it as it has to do with I'm so sick of my typical music I listen to.  I've played my favorite bands to death and I need a break. These new pop acts are buffers allowing me to take some time to cleanse my palette so I can come back and enjoy my wheelhouse band again.
Speaking of music I don't like, Nine Inch Nails.
I admit that when I was in high school i listened to them along with alot of other shit-tastic radio metal bands. I use to find Nine Inch Nails innovative but now days it just sounds like someone trying to dial a phone set to a beat. I have a hard time calling it music anymore. I cannot figure out what I thought was so great about them.
I'm also way over mash-up remix songs from like Girl Talk or The Hood Internet.
Its just musical bukkake.
The listener gets hit in the face with like 5 songs all at once. It was kind of a cute novelty to begin with but now there are so many people making remixes that are meant to be ironic and it is just fucking awful and ridiculous at this point.
Then I was subjected to some entirely ass-tastic gener-rock. The type they play on WJJO, like Korn who sound like they have playing the same song since 1996. Their bassist has definitely been playing the exact same bass line forever. I doubt he knows how to play anything beyond the same one I've heard for over 10 years. This butt rock is utterly awful, there was one song where it was only the word suicide screamed ad nauseum over some generic drop tuned fuzz.
Who the fuck likes this shit? Why does anyone like this shit beyond the fact that it gets played on the radio? This type of music is bland and seems to appeal to those who think eyebrow rings and tongue piercings are still fashionable. Sorry they don't, they make you look like a massive tool, which you have already proved by listening to such horrible music in the first place.

I then went off on how I never could fathom the reason why people wasted money on installing sound systems into their vehicles where you heard nothing but ear shaking bass. If you can't hear the music what the fuck is the point. Buying a system that will quite possibly rattle your car apart is beyond idiotic.

Then I started thinking about politics and how much I can't stand any type of political movement either. I find this Occupy movement absolutely idiotic on a couple levels, one being that there doesn't seem to be any unified "statement". Some people are bitching about discrepancy between the rich and everyone else, but then there are others clinging to anti-war statements, anarchy ethos among others. Just shut up and gather under the same banner.
Secondly, who the fuck are these people who can just hang out in a shanty town for what like a year or so. Are these trust-fund activists or jobless fucks? Do some of them go work at Whole Foods at night and hang out making signs during the day in the shanty towns? I know some people just show up for the big rallies but a large number just hang out.
This isn't to say that I side with the rich, this country is absolutely fucked on so many levels what with how destructively divided we as a nation are, there is no such thing as common ground anymore. Not to mention we seem to be in the midst of what is basically an economic civil war. BUT my big problem is that you cannot in this day and age get anything accomplished by protesting/ being on the outside of "the system". Those in power be it liberal or conservative know how to marginalize any fringe way of thinking so in all honesty what the fuck is the point unless you plan of running for office yourself? I've been in the middle of protests in 2004 Republican National Convention. I saw the completely gigantic turn-out and they were united under one message and what the fuck happened? NOTHING! Not one goddamn thing succeeded. The war wasn't stopped, Gee W. was still re-elected, Wall St. got fat and ruined the economy.
So beyond voting nothing will be accomplished. People will continue to get riled up over social issues that will never revert but piss off each side so they become blind to how people are really getting fucked in the ass over. The 1960's taught the power structure just how to subvert any movement from affecting policy in any meaningful way.
Anyone who thinks any different is diluted.
"Fuck it Dude, let's go bowling".

Then there is the stupidity of different religions, which are obviously rooted in the exactly the same mythos which no one wants to acknowledge. BLAH BLAH BLAH, there is no fucking point in choosing one over another besides to make yourself feel superior over people who don't believe what you do. Not like there is anything except a fade to black anyway. I understand belief in something else to mitigate the fear of death but beyond that reason, I just don't fucking get why promote one version of "god" over any other. It's all bullshit posturing and I cannot support that.
I'm in no way saying I have any answers I just know people are far too concerned with the wrong questions.

I also hate cheeky morning local news where they joke around like these newcasters are friends or something, it comes across as forced and is sickening that early in the morning. Just give me the fucking news then shut the fuck up.

People who think remakes of older movies are great piss me off too. No one can be bothered to view the original and need tools like Zac Effron or Kristen Stewart to shit all over a story that was told much more effectively years ago. The worst are remakes of movies that are barely 10 years old. Why not fucking get off your lazy ass and watch a movie with an original story or plot instead of allowing fucktards like Michael Bay to remake classics. Even Tim Burton is guilty of turning a great movie like Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory into a pile of cat vomit on a raccoon carcass which was Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

I don't give a shit about much except for my wife and daughter. They are the only things I don't find patently ridiculous or exasperating. I like stupid things too, bad movies, pro wrestling, etc... but I am fully aware of how stupid they are. Putting up with dumb people is just exhausting.

I feel old.
Rant over for now

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Winter is fuckin finally over

Owwch my mouth.
Almost a month ago I got my wisdom teeth removed (finally) and my right side of my mouth jaw is still killing me. The left seems to be healing fine but anytime I eat or especially if I drink anything cold I get an immediate blinding headache. I'm wondering if maybe its got a big infection or my bone or nerves are exposed. I really have no clue but I should probably get it checked out sometimes soon.
Shit's been busy, work, packing up our current apartment to move into my sister-in-law's condo now that she has moved in with her soon to be husband.
This spring is fucking hectic. Moving, a family wedding, and finally my daughter is turning a year old in just over a month. I'm looking forward to summer being a bit more relaxing even though I need to plan us a trip to Des Moines to see some of my family.

Moving: I'm so excited to be getting out of our shitty apartment complex and slamming doors, yelling outside at 2am not to mention the lack of space. Lucy needs the space to roam around because confining her to the living room is not cutting it. Makes for a cranky baby. With the new apartment she'll be able to roam around and we won't be so cramped either. Plus we got a sectional couch and it is glorious. I've always wanted one and now I have one. If I ever get into a bad enough argument with Suzy that I have to sleep on the couch, it won't be that much of a punishment.

Wedding: Suzy's sister Robin is getting married in the beginning of May and I'm going to be one of the photographers, I'm the one who gets to photograph the bride getting ready. Thats gonna be weird.
The last wedding I was at I got shit-faced at the reception. Don't think that's gonna happen this time even though my mom is taking Lucy for the night. Then again I don't really get the opportunity to drink much anymore so maybe I will get a bit shitshow.

Daughter: April 27th she'll be one year old which is kinda just fucking mind boggling. The year has gone both fast and slow. Slow because that first few months where she was insanely crabby and screaming couldn't end fast enough for me. I'm surprised she even clings to me right now because I'm sure I was a pretty scary person for such a little kid, what with me having very little patience which I am learning to gain as the months go by. It takes time to know what the hell you are doing.
Fast because I can't barely remember her being so damn tiny. In my mind she's always been medium sized, except now she can jabber and crawl around at lightning speed. I just know in the next month or so she could be walking.
I'm sure I'm just a proud parent but I feel like she is pretty advanced for her age. I think she is hitting her milestones earlier and I can't help but think it's because she's gonna be very smart. I really hope so. She's gonna have her Mom-Mom's looks because she hardly looks like me but maybe she'll have the intelligence I had as a kid.
I'm still waiting til she starts to like the things that I do, right now she likes "The Office" theme song and some really poppy songs when I'm trying to get her to bounce to The Ramones and NoFx but it hasn't really paid off yet. She does love the Fraggle Rock song though which is kinda cute.
She says "Mom-Mom" but I've haven't gotten her to call me to "Poppa" or "Pop" yet. I get a "da-da" now and again. Wondering when she'll eventually pick up on my cursing and follow suit. That will be great to explain to the Grand-parents.
Suzy and I got into a discussion about exposing Lucia to religion while we were watching "Religulous" and Suzy said she wants her to go to church once in a while even though Suzy doesn't go. I asked her if she planned on taking her to Temple or a Mosque as well. She said she didn't think so because she didn't know much about them. That is my exact point for not exposing her to it until she asks about it, insomuch as by taking her only to church, which ever denomination she would go with, is teaching her that THAT religion is the right one because its the only one she gets the exposure to. I'd much rather focus on teaching her to be a good person and if she is curious about religion we can explain the various ones and maybe take her if she asks to go. I wanna find the best way to keep her mind open but not make her feel bad about being curious about a belief system that I don't subscribe to. It's gonna be a tough line to walk but such is as being a parent i suppose.
Oh so birthday party, which is going to be I believe the April 29th which is the day after D.J.'s bachelor party so all the husbands and boyfriends attending on my wife's side will be hurting a bit. We are gonna try and keep it somewhat healthy, cake obviously but also kabobs and some fruit. I am still pulling for vodka soaked gummi bears for the adults but I am thinking that won't happen.
I can only imagine what my daughter will get for her birthday because god knows we have a million stuffed animals and right now she only notices maybe two of them. I haven't even begun to think what we are going to get her. I don't wanna spoil her this early but I'd like to get her something fun that she will get use of for a long time. No clue what that will be for a one year old.

Work is keeping be busy, not really difficult just draining. I'm constantly tired by two p.m. and I don't know why. Maybe diet because I've been getting enough sleep for the most part as Lucia has had somewhat normal sleeping patterns. As long as we nebulize her. She had pneumonia a week or two ago and as much as she screams while she is being held to have her breathe in the stuff, it really makes her tired and sometimes she passes out in my arms which is adorable.
I also got some work done on my back tattoo and I'm super stoked about how it's turning out. I'm excited to see how it looks whenever I finally get it finished, which will probably be a long time from now.

I've been blown away by the second season of the Walking Dead, if anyone reads my PodsOrgODSblog would already know. I love streaming cable shows online. Its great. 

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

"Sucks To Your Asmar"

I hate the Police. Not law enforcement but the band. I was at work today and someone played what must have been their greatest hits and fuck me is it awful. I was especially annoyed with a song that goes "doo doo doo, dah dah dah"(That might even be the name of it) throughout the entire song.  Its fucking idiotic. I can't even begin to describe how much I detest that damn song.
Songs that don't go anywhere lyrically annoy the living shit out of me. And as much as I use to like them, I feel the same way about the Beastie Boys. They've been writing the same song over and over. The backing music is different but all they do is boast about their lyrical prowess. Save for a select few songs ("Sabotage", "Paul Revere", No Sleep til Brooklyn") its just different ways of saying the same thing. It gets hot damned boring. Took me a while to really notice it then listening to a song off their newest album, no clue what the name was, but it dawned on me that I've heard it before. Not that song but what they were saying wasn't anything new. The songs don't go anywhere.
Now take hip hop artists like Atmosphere, Kanye West they can spit about how great they are but they tell a story along the way. As much as I dislike him as an artist, I have some respect for Eminem's lyrical skill. I guess when I listen to music, the instruments take a backseat to lyrics. I can listen to NoFx play the same three chords in every song but the words make my mind work and imagine what they are talking about.  Probably why I hate techno and dance music so much. Its repetitive and asinine.
I'm most likely just getting old and jaded but so much doesn't thrill me anymore. I'd rather hear Willie Nelson spin a story for me than listen to a group as utterly useless like LMFAO(blehhhh)